instead of running and gng to the gym i've been playing basketball more often zzz lol....only went to the gym once.

feeling sick nw wth.

a hole in the chest

ehhh lies shyt anyth said.

die bk in.i cfm cui.nth to do cfm die.

cant blame the loneliness setting in.

aniwaei haf2 things in mind dat i tot i will nv do.

i'm tinking whether to learn bike riding a not.zzz dats for like ah beng but i tink it quite cool.itx viable.itx cheaper.itx sth i can afford.

the 2nd things is giving free tuition like for pri sch maths or sth i tink there r pple whu needs help out there mayb they r jsut less previlege.

itx just one of the feeling dat i wana be there for whoever whu nids help.becos no one deserves to feel like dat.

run.gym.

2 books from the library!i cant find the 2 i found ytd la wtf.

sometimes i tink my english reali rocks.but my spelling reali sucks.oh dats random if i read more books mayb i will haf gd english man.itx raining nw wth.early in the morning.

aniwae sth reali unpleasant happen ytd and i was reali quite unprepared for it.i woke p wif a reali weird dream den BOOMZ the thing came.taken by a storm but how.suck thumb la.lifes like dat.

okay the clearing must start soon liao.

work gng to start soon oso cannot slack animore guess it might reali be quite straining for me all the brain work and planning.sucks eh..

actuali i'm not reali feeling dat gd.it just like falling in a hole once again.hate dat feeling just dat tis time itx a bit worse.just waiting for myself to hit the btm b4 i climb out of it.

one thing is i experienced it b4 and now im more or less more matured.

i just tink itx pretty unfair and fucked up yupz

i guess i might haf to depend on chocolates to kip alive nw just hope the ants stop eating them du lan sia.

i bought one box of vanhouten chocs.vintage metal box and the ants still got in.wth.10 buckssss

new pay heard it 1087...hope can cover wat i spend last month on all the nonsense i duno wat.

sian i only hope dog was lying but i noe he's not.

there she goes!

finally grew sick of the song you belong wif me.lol

NEXt hahas another taylor swift song.whitehorse.

different phase different song to suit the mood.songs usually sound better when it suits ur mood

sian gng to bk in wish i can bring tis song along wif me but i dun haf a music player.

hahas oh god i hai medin and zav lose 55 dollars each cos i nv go buy their aos...hahas.....nooo

i'm not a princess this aint a fairytale.im not the one u sweep off the feet leaving at the stair

stupid gal shouldve known shoudve known.

emoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

must keep away la -_-

zzz

time to issue a restraining order!

and i am gng gaga over sth i cant get.sucks.

buttons the happiest man.y?cos he has jessica machibata zzz

rights things r gng to start soon and i dun reali wan it to start tink i still haf a few days of leave nw wonder how to use it

these days can ask me anyth bout the news i read everyth other den money twice.dat includes classified.lol

finsh my book!Men In White.

true dat most singaporeans should read it.gives us a brief look into how singapore was built!quite an ardous task i guess

but i tot the book was a little irrelevant aft the halfway mark.it started to get brief and made the book boring.overrated i must sae it failed to gif me an objective view a different story.

i had enuf of success stories.rather i wana haf a look at how things failed.


the singapore dream hahas oh my god everione wans to win toto!right?hahas.

wheres my knight in shing armour.

found a place to emo lols new place so i'll bring CHAOS AND WHINES HERE

i dun haf th epatience so i lost 30 bucks WTF but money doesnt much matter now.finding a new goal seems more impt now -_- life is too boring liao so many things i dnwan to take a step first and do it or sometimes too lazy!lololol



k pls decide i'm gng to get an itouch so can go online mayb.

aniwae watever!!fine watch inglorious basterds itx veh artsy i must sae some meaning behind duno whether should read into it a not lols but it does have some crude humour

2ml gng out yesssss see some gals.LOL

some how or rather i tink i am dng stupid tings...i am so unsettled now i duno wat to do again!dats y my life has always been so screwed up!!haha

and u had to screw it up more -_-

but i haf came out wif one goal to race fats wif hair.and i noe the hair will win lols wth nv been able to do it..JIAN FEi.

aniwae i am pretty sick itx stopping me from hitting the track isnt dat a great excuse!aft running a bit one tues nite almost died wth.all the phlegm tavel to my lungs or sth..and it got seriously worse....oh boy.

somehow or rather i've awaoken leh...isnt time powerful.feels like the march bak to camp when i went for warrior i noe i can do it but it will take time the SGTs were pushing me to go faster but my legs were so painful but i told them i wun gif up.of cos i din -_- but all i can sae it was just a slow and fucking painful thing.well draw the similarities

the best female video of the year just got to watch it and itx a song which has stayed in my head but i din go and get it from friends but aft listening to it i reali had to get it liao lol.....got it from zav....and i like the song!and theres new songs by susan boyle.she can reali sing man but itx too much from me draws me into further solitude.itx called white horse i tink quite classical and reali well sung.

taylor swifts pwns shes quite chio but still cant beat hudgens HAHA oh well i'm so bored tis few days but had a few tasks though.such as GP lols the ferry fucking stinks cos of sweaty people and and and i took the ferry so many damn times zzz

dreaming bout the day u wake up and find
that what u've been looking for has been here the whole time
if u could see that i;m the one who understands u
been here all laong so y cant u seeeee
you belong wif me
standing by and waiting at ur back door
all this time how could u not noe baby.

for one it will always remain a dream and two i wun understand u true i've been here all along not true dat u belong to me and i'm too freaking far from ur bak door and u will nv noee

if taylor swifts comes to singapore for a performance i will go!haha i swear oh boy tis song pwns better den love story!!wheeee kinda of feel better aft listening to tis song

alright gng to take my hot magazine to hunt for some nice songs on youtube.

uh ive been making so much wrong choices in life wats wrong wif another.

2weeks of stupid shyt woohoo and i am done posted to HQ duno whether itx a blessing anot hope to take some things back from the nxt 1 years plus in army since i got my rank le.but i cant use it cos no recruits.but i reali wanted to be a gd SGT whu ask me unfit.sian

been freaking bored?i am so bored like reali bored.i haf no itouch and my psp isnt rdy.zzz.wth.....k got a book men in white.i tink it wn be much la theres a extent u can write till if not u will be charged lols dats how things go here.but itx a new perspective!

time to visit the library and stuff read history and some psychology stuff mayb cant go NUS den haf to go NTU psychology...sucked it up whu ask me to be dumb well time to self enrich and mayb slim down a lil build some muscles but i tink i'm making a lil progress!run more play more!

i'm so freaking bored in camp la like nw even worse gng to haf no one to tok to and my phone is dead??!!nv vibrating imbal sad no friends.wtf.

saw a pretty sick video on youtube wonder if itx real lol.

lets do away wif fiction time to step into reality!i tink itx workingggggg

ouch my thumb injured again sian.nxt friday bkout hope it comes soonnnnnn

make my phone vibrate zzz

1 weeks le.aft taiwan...

it wasnt easy the terrain was new we all endured i did.i gave a bit of effort to help.it was the last thing for our platoon sth i can do.....

warrior was hard no wonder we can be called sispec warriors nw.

typhoon came things got delayed.real wind guys real rain..nv likei've seen b4.

i noe the mood isnt right nw typing tis.i'm just sad nw.again.

i'm 3rd sgt alex nw.soc done.but no itx still emptiness filling me.

dat sunday wanted to go down to tok to bballers but was too tired and lazy.haha hope to get the chance soon

i missed the parade i was still branded a failure den.i wanted to make my mum proud to attend tis parade but sad.

it was impt.i din passout it sucks all my friends there.i hate parade but parade marks an ending u dun go u dun feel like u haf pass out.

almost died in taiwan...luckily sum pple lacked behind and we had to wait for them
if not we would haf been swallowed by the landslide it was a majestic sight.taking place right infront of u.it was scary.hahax

free me from this pain.

i survived taiwan thank you sgt jeffrey for his teeachings
sgt heng kiang for walking the last walk wif me the imbal one
2WO tan for his knowledge
OC for everyth i respect him alot.
and 2IC of course his passion and dedication.

there r thing in life u dunwan to accept but no u must learn how to

isnt tis the 2ml u asked for.isnt it.ask urself be trueful to urself.

i noe it is unintentional but it when u do sth dat is unintentional dats shows how truthful sth is the denial means nth.i assume i analyze and when tis combines it is potent and oso fucked up.i tink i am gd so itx potent not fucked up. ha i'm a joke pls.

dats wats gng to make 2nite imbal

reflect now.be honest to urself and of cos be logical.i just haf to be logical and easily the answer is seen and known.

today i am 19 and 6 months old.i am now making the choice to cripple myself.but itx the logical choice.

i assume making an ass out of you and me tis part of me has reali caused so much probs uh but other den dat logic itx logic logic logic

uh now i must tell myself this...stop lying to urself.

and i looked at tis nick on msn learning has nv been so painful mr forgel's nick.making sense nw.

k la duno where i will be posted to.BMTC or SISPEC lols.omg the sudden change.heard pple up there not veh happy k sispec is not bad just stressful and haf to go overseas?z right.lets prepare for a gd one nw.

woke up wif a reali bad dream....crap.....and i was reali slpy...wanted to continue slping...but for reasons i got out of bed....damn slpy....but i only woke up to be disappointed.... i dunwan to fly...i dunwan to go and die...omg the breifing was lik wth man....."u guys r gng to a *********plantations there is a lot ********* snakes and they r veh poisonous...WTF???

k tis a big time joke"last batch 2 trainess got bitten by scorpions"

k loads of stuff but i forgot alr........and like wtf they gave us condoms....tink we will end up playing wif them when everyth ends in the hotel...lollike filll it up wif water or sth....i dun see any of my mates gng to nid them....

itx gng to be full of bullshyt itx gng to suck....i dunwan to go

in sucha emo mood again.......so in the end whu's gng to be there........like nobody....so where r u nw?nowhere.....

just interested in dng ur own stuff again.....oh wellls...haf fun at ur fucked up party....thats gng to be the last straw man....plus itx today....haf u ever heard of such a thing??no itx shows how uncommitted u r....sucks

sad i'm not gng to send anyth over man....nope!hahax

omg apparently sms costs 60 cents each from there to singapore and 1 min tink is 1.20 lol....wth.....

well done u.....

4 more days haha.....omg......

cant believe i am arguing over tis.......so do i consider tis a won or a lost deep inside i reali dunwan u to go but den again applying logic and some sense of unselfishness or perharps normal tinking...just go ba....k cmoplicated lousy sentence structure things only i can understand once again....

but tis is wat tis is for...for me to look bak and read and noe wat happen.....okay but my eng is not dat bad is it.lol...i'll gif u dat A for GP if u gif me dat A for hist.i wun mind a C

so sad nw again! like an emoturtle aka zh..wth lol....his blog is like farni i cant believe those retards scolding him and stuff....wth man....and apparently he's gng for a gal lol....k he's a poor thing man...hope he's dng well....

and oh boy wat did i do tis 2 days....cant believe it!but i guess itx nth much oso la haha....just a few questions dats all....both times same person....wth is tis....so did i make the wrong desicions twice....yes i look at u...my choices haf i screwed up all of them....

bells r ringing only to me...making sense only to me.....uhh wtf no friends.wth.

2 different lives we will nv be able to understand each other how many times haf i repeated tis....

i was so bored i went to sign up for a twitter account and i tink no one in my hotmail has it cos i cant trace ani1...lol......wth...tis is lame.

if i just happen to stray things might just go crazy.....y do u trust me i wonder....but sry i cant gif u dat trust man...i cant explain tis....

i'm gng off to a faraway jail nw...to go thru a different kind of endurance called field endurance when the world is urbanizing at tis amazing rate...wheres the logic...

k lets be frank life inside is not dat bad other den outfield...eliminate dat u might just haf more people signing on....hahahx
oh my....
god
wth
is
tis
bullshit
so stress
i just wana pass soc nw
i dunwan my CSB badge
i wana passout
save the money u guys gif me

and just sum1 there whu reali cares.is it still u.or just anione nw.
i'm nt a flirt
nt wild
nt a clubber
so itxj ust anione genuine pretty cute and my style...dats so rare and unlikely anione will approach...lol.....k weird tots...

nt like it din happen b4 but unlikely it will again...

wat randomness and toking to myself....dats wat happen when u dun haf sum1 to tok to when u r not exactly in a relationship....

19 years alr i guess i reali din haf sum1 like dat b4!!or mayb i did.

and wheres the mood for a poem

truth inside lies outside...uhh i am not as smart as i used to be....

booooooking in to do soc to do ippt y am i so fat wat happen to those days.....hahax........y izit like dat.....i just wan to pass soc.....thx pls...


welcome to taiwan.

oh wow i dlt-ed a few entries....anything to do wif relation to men in green wif little hair and make to haf no sense of logic. lol....

bad day i failed soc again same station again...nv able to pass it..fucking ropes.....

2 months 3 crashes 538 dead and counting i believe there was like one or 2 more crashed dat happen...lol i cant believe i am not flying SIA seriously itx the best the most safe....

emo........how many oil lamps do i haf to pick up to fufil my needs not luxuries mind u...hahax....

i cant find a gd enuf song to suit my mood....so hard to be able to...reali...

i had so many tots dat filled my mind just nw but i reali cant tink of any of them nw....

time has reali been scarce....out in the real world...away from tis legal jail....i cant see when i will get a break from tis...even sch students gets a break now and den...y not us?

3 weeks u came and gone too fast i guess.....one cockster in my bunk said some lame things to set my mind in motion..."wah the SOC damn shag uh i run until i wan to die....i tried so hard i close my eyes to run.....den i saw the gal i liked"....full of cock bullsyt guy lol made me think....makes me a joke man...

to me dat was sth he will nv get....but it reali shows how much dedication he has...his motivation and mayb sum1 truely dear to him...but seriously he's so cock he wun get a gal even though he will be rich cos he's smart...lol

so wat about me...wats left?

i guess itx nt my fault...i dun care...i'm flying off soon to a land i've nv been to not like i'm interested to go there...itx gng to b hell itx gng to be bullshyt.....how i wish sum stray bullet just injure me or mayb even kill me....a long term attend C den down pes hahax...

i'm not interested in making new friends nw...like long term for life friends...i feel dat i haf enuf....i'm satisfied wif just tis 2 groups of friends i haf...

haha the song of freedom....duno y...itx still tis song...lan tian by huang yi da...reali gifs me the state of mind dat itx in a blue clear sky...

so draggy so painful...i hate things tis way...im effing impatient

it 2 different mindsets 2 different mentality nw......

i cant stand the new songs dat r coming out nw...hahax guess dats the reason y i stop listeing to radio....no more slow and emo songs....and nw i am listening to nan guo by 5566 how many donkey years was dat ago...haha...

steamboat cancelled...FUCK

omg green tea mint tastes gd man but it screwing my tummy up...

and wats tis emotion called?3 alphabhets...the emotion humans feels most of the time...SAD